ideas

Mother’s Day

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom and Toni.

I used to have a little routine one night a week that I found extremely relaxing – holing up in my room to read vacuous women’s magazines, sip wine and generally block out the rest of the world. On one such misspent evening, I came across one of those reader write-in conceits where motivated souls compete for the best answer to a vaguely trite question in order to win, say, a basket of shampoos.

Three pages were filled with the alternately heartfelt and merely curious answers to “what is the most important thing your mother ever taught you?” Now it’s one thing to ponder such a question and another entirely to publicly reply with a reference to “Wind Beneath My Wings,” and, yet, I read most of them. Everything from perfectly applying lipstick to surviving grief to cultivating the elixir of self-esteem.

How to decide... Is it what you used most? What changed you most at that time? What spins the kindest tale?

Disappointingly, perhaps, the most important thing my mother taught me is rather banal, not the sort of thing that inspires, but perhaps, still, some of the best advice I know.

Stop eating when you’re full.

If I recall correctly, advice first given to her by her father. And, oddly, a guiding principle that can do most anything from keep a person thin to teach satisfaction to avoiding being owned by the things once owned by you. In a country where so many of us are born armed to the teeth with privilege, recognizing what is enough is a rare lesson indeed.

For this, warm chocolate chip cookies and homemade Halloween costumes – Happy Mother’s Day.

Highlights and Lowlights from the Four Days of Thanksgiving:

Thanksgiving Eve:

Lowlight: What’s the opposite of “making good time”? Oh, yeah, making a 3-hour trip in 6½ hours! Columbus is a MSA leader in the loss of 25- to 39-year olds. So most of the people my age who live here are not from here. Combine that with OSU classes running through Wednesday afternoon and the road out of town that night closely resembled a parking lot. The first 10 miles clocked in at an hour-and-a-half. After zipping along at a speedy 45-mph for another hour, an accident closed the road down again.

Highlight: This is a random one, but getting rear-ended in traffic was pretty interesting. A (likely-) college kid was stopped behind us in the second traffic jam. He must have let off the brake because – slam! He smacked into the Raus’ back bumper hard. I had two nervous kittens on my lap who looked at me as if I had betrayed them. Getting out to exchange info, it was clear that forgiveness was the only option – the kid’s father was in the passenger seat and he’s the one who got out to chat. Can you imagine rear-ending someone in stand-still traffic with your dad in the car just before spending a long weekend at his place? Luckily the Raus is an old car and the damage was tiny – so we were happy to say Happy Thanksgiving and resume the wait. The highlight is making that kids holiday eminently happier!

Thanksgiving Day:
Lowlight: Waiting, waiting, waiting for Sister to get home so that we could eat the turkey. Usually we eat around 2, but she got a slightly late start and we had to w a i t until 4! Ah – I had turkey on the brain!

Highlight: Turkey, obviously, turkey! The entire meal was delicious – I was looking forward to leftovers before I even finished the last bite. Kudos, Dad House!

Day After Thanksgiving – morning / afternoon:
Lowlight: Missed an excellent opportunity to eat a breakfast turkey sandwich (don’t worry, I made up for it) and was starving thoughout shopping adventure

Highlight: Despite her small size, Sister is an interesting cross of a linebacker and Moses inside a shopping mall. Normally, the worst thing about shopping for me is the crowds – all those people pressing against each other, jostling, pushing – yuck! But with sister, I just follow a few steps behind her and even on the busiest shopping day of the year we sail smoothly through the crowds like we’re the only ones there. 

Day After Thanksgiving – evening:Lowlight: Ouch, sore nose. I’m very allergic to my dad’s house – something about mold and crawlspaces, but by this time the itchy eyes, constant sneezing and fitful sleep were starting to get to me.

Highlight: Great dinner with mom – tasty chili, yummy dessert and good conversation.
 

Day After the Day After
Lowlight: Riding around the windy, hilly roads of Western PA in the back seat of Dad’s car – did I mention he think he’s a race car driver and there were three of us in the back?

Highlight: A fun evening with the Dad House crew and Auntie and Andrea. Good stories and a fun dinner + getting to check out Auntie’s new digs.

Sunday Trip Home
Lowlight: The excitement of traveling with the herd (two cats and a dog) had definitely worn off – their fussy whining was no long amusing

Highlight: Made it home in around 3 hours!

 

Top Sightings:

A fat, fuzzy, delightful donkey on a rope-leash in someone’s front lawn
Chickens actually crossing the road
A cow-crossing sign, like this one
One desperate driver careening across a couple of lanes when the traffic jam let up, only to barely make it out of his car before relieving himself all over the shoulder
And, lots of bizarre things from the strangest place I’ve ever been … but that’s a story for tomorrow!

 

Thanksgiving Pics

On a lighter note, I’m back from an extended holiday weekend with the parents and sib.

Here’s a quick pictorial recap of some of the players.

1. Because I have no pride when it comes to leftovers and because I, too, marvel at the architectural wonder of my day-after Turkey sandwiches, I let my dad take this lovely picture. The layers I’m trying to open my mouth wide enough to munch are turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, cranberries, lettuce, cheddar cheese and mayo – all on a tasty bakery roll. Delicious!
2. Next up, we have sister and I going all “What Not to Wear” on Mom by taking sample outfit pictures for her at the mall.
3. Off to Mom’s. Here’s she’s scooping chili – a delicious tomatoy concoction. Sister and I dunked half a loaf of buttered bread in the yummy juice before returning the remains of meat and beans :o)
4. Still at Mom’s. This is her fiancé Joe. Also note the tasty apple-cake pie in the background.
5. Hanging out in Auntie’s family room (that might be “rumpus room” in PA-speak), Andrea (dad’s girlfriend) and Auntie Sharon are chatting away. Auntie is looking fabulous – yet another member of the Householder clan who actually looks better as she gets older (hoping I have that gene!)
6. On the other side of the couch, that’s me, dad and sister fighting over the loungiest seat. I think dad fixed his own “red eye” on this one – he looks a bit like a pirate in the eyes.
7. Jim hiding out in the next room, beating up a pinball or two.
8. Miss Willie angry as hell over her unplanned relocation.
9. Bug playing some music on packing day.
10. And, finally, Sister engaged in her favorite part of the holidays – lounging about watching tv or otherwise relaxing.

My Virtual Family

Aren't our parents supposed to be UNCOMFORTABLE with technology... all slow to adopt new gadgets and forms of communication and whatnot? Well, somehow I ended up in an early adopter family. I get digital pictures from all over. Genuinely old people email me (ha-ha, now you have to paranoidly guess who I'm talking about, family!) Well, what to do with all this virtual media that I can't handily tape into a scrapbook ... I guess I need to start a family photo album online here.

This is a first take - more work to come. If anyone knows of any interesting online albums that are more ... scrapbooky, or just more interesting than pressing the next button a hundred times, let me know. I tried Sony's Screenblast, but it was very unsatisfactory - clunky user experience, easy to lose everything, nothing to standardize the photos that were uploaded, etc.

Oh, and, above, much to Auntie's horror, I'm sure, is a fun photo of: Aunt Sharon, Dad, Aunt Cathy, Uncle Ralph - taken at the Uncle's place out in Camas, WA.

posted by Leigh Householder

Raising Dad - Part 2

The second part of the story Laura and I wrote about Dad is up on Knot today. You'll see one more piece by me before Knot stops publishing in a few weeks (I wrote a segment of their Finding Home series).

posted by Leigh Householder

Free Rides

And, of course, J charioted the family about on his shiny new motorcycle. Pics of Sister returning from her second ride -

posted by Leigh Householder

Eric Clapton and The Family Visit

Coming across this New York Times paid obit for Paula Danziger, the children's author, I was inspired to come clean…

Paula Danziger, beloved children's book writer, would like to inform you that she isn't avoiding your calls, she passed away on July 8, 2004.

While I am in truly good health, I also was not avoiding your calls – just off entertaining family. I had a few little tidbits I’d been meaning to post; so, I set those up to post once a day while secretly going offline. I've been loose in the world for days (deep cover!)

So, this is my first real-time post since about this time last week. Good to be back.

Tomorrow, I’ll add news about the Athens, Ohio visit – but, tonight an update on the family one…

Dad and Sister came to town for Monday’s Eric Clapton concert. Definitely the family’s favorite shared rocker interest. Tickets were predictably expensive; so we opted for the upper level, just to the right of the stage (first base line). We get there, head up to the vertigo seats, and check out the perilous angle to the floor. Just then *poof* a fabulous usher comes over and offers us better seats. Better? Try about 17 rows back from the stage, just to the right, perfect angle. We were so close that we could see the cellulite on the back-up dancer’s legs without the help of the jumbotron!

Of course, that might be a comment on the aging state of the band, more than the excellence of the seats, but, hey, they were great …

Kind of funny to watch the old dads rock out, though. Clapton was sporting bright white sneaker-shoes, Gap-wear khakis and a short-sleeved checked shirt. Some in the band had very, very scary dental work. Only bassist Nathan East managed to pull off sexy, with his trendy red print shirt, faded jeans, brown suede shoes and chunky rings.

But, what a show –

Clapton’s is one band that seems to just keep getting better. And, you know, the Midwest loves an underdog… So, Clapton couldn’t have done more to win us all over than including the steel guitar player from the opening act in his encore – and, watching his “solo” admiringly.

The openers were Robert Randolph & The Family Band. Most concerts couldn’t get better than that opening act and still Clapton blew them away. But, what a fabulous complement in styles … the energy and the musicianship exemplified was incredible.

And, for me, not a big fan of concerts (I like music, I’m just not so into watching the people creating it or dancing at my seat), the people watching was outstanding. One nearby dad clearly thought he was charming snakes with the arm dancing he had going on. We were perfectly positioned to watch the lines of people migrating from the floor seats to restrooms, concessions, etc. – Columbus in all its glory. Love it.

The rest of the visit went very well. Good company. Good fun. Laid back. No fights (really).

And, got my mantra going on for enjoying family visits – just repeat the following to self …

-Being born with a normal skeletal structure instead of the slinky my sister was blessed with, does not necessarily mean that I’m a fat cow. (The fact that she eats a banana while I eat four bowls of cereal … well, that’s another story.)
-My house is not a “starter home.” It is perfectly appropriate to select moderation over a McMansion ethic.
-Cellulite on a relatively thin person is less a personal failing than a hereditary curse. Maybe.

See, I feel better already...

posted by Leigh Householder

Happy Fathers' Day, belated

I know, I know, Laura and I go on about our dad more than most any other grown-up kids that you've met. We have a bunch of stories - but only 10 or so favorites - and we tend to laugh louder than our friends during the telling. What can I say? Our dad is a delight. And, we decided to write a little of his story - a part of it we know - as a Fathers Day tribute to the old guy. Happy Fathers Day, Dad. We love you.

See Dad in 1975
See Dad in 1983
See Dad in 2000
See Dad this summer

posted by Leigh Householder

29 Years Later

A few weeks ago, I came across a great blog with a photo album called "26 Things." From their kitten to a pretty ray of sunshine, it was just 26 random things.

So, for my 29th birthday I wanted to create "29 Things," but a month later, all I have is a butterfly and icky meat on the grill. So, I changed my own assignment and went with 29 pictures from my life so far. Watch me grow up here. And, enjoy my life of misguided fashion!

posted by Leigh Householder

My Parrot Dad

For my birthday, my dad decided to introduce me to a piece of Americana I had previously, um, missed ... we piled in the car on a sunny 90-degree Saturday afternoon to tailgate before the Columbus Jimmy Buffet concert ... Although the grownups said this event was very tame, there was still plenty to see and hear: see the pictures.

The thing about Jimmy Buffet is that the music isn't really that good - it's perfect for background noise, but sounds kind of monotonous when left the center of attention hour after hour. Nonetheless, women (and men) of all ages screamed at deafening decibels, possibly in a fog of margarita madness.

It's the kind of music that can make the white folks purse their lips like fishes, curl their hands into fists and wiggle around just slightly off-time to the music. It's the kind of music that brings beach balls and margaritas and open parties. And, it's the kind of music that can inspire the building of a delightfully squishy indoor shark blimp.

Fins to the left, fins to the right ... four encores later, I'm back to the real world ...

[And, a good time was had by all! Thanks, dad!]

posted by Leigh Householder